Ich möchte mich für ein Praktikum in China bewerben. Habe die Bewerbung und den Lebenslauf bereits geschrieben, da dies jedoch meine erste Bewerbung auf Englisch ist, befürchte ich, dass sich einige Fehler eingeschlichen haben könnten. Nun meine Bitte an Euch
, bitte lest meine Bewerbung, ich bin für jede konstruktive Kritik offen. Ob Ihr grammatikalische, inhaltliche etc. Fehler findet, bitte her damit ... Dankeschön 
Ach ja und noch etwas, mein Anschreiben ist eindeutig zu lang ... finde aber alles wichtig, keine Ahnung wo ich kürzen könnte, bin wahrscheinlich einfach zu nah am Thema 
Anschreiben:
Re: Application for a 5-month student internship at xyz from 1stMarch to 31st July 2011
Dear Mr. xyz
I am a German student at the xyz Institute of Technology/Germany majoring in Industrial Engineering and Management (Wirtschaftsingenieurwesen). I am at the end of my second semester and I working toward my M.Sc. (Master of Science) degree in business engineering.
As the enclosed curriculum vitae shows, I have already completed my study at University of Applied Sciences in xyz/ Germany, as Graduate engineer in Clothing Technology with great success in 2009. Furthermore, I worked for xyz, an international multichannel retailer, during a 6-month internship. There I gained considerable practical working experience.
According to your advertisement at monster.de, you are currently seeking for an internship with very good computer knowledge and good language skills. I am very interested in this position, and believe that my education and employment background are appropriate for the position.
My coursework and work background have supplied me with many skills. As part of my studies I selected marketing and engineering as my focus areas of study. I am particularly interested in technology, its administration and marketing and would like to work more closely at the interface of technology, strategy, finance and distribution.
Through my study time at the university, I have experience with some CAD programs such as AutoCAD, Catia and Assyst. I have the ECDL Core Certificate
(European Computer Driving Licence) for MS Office. I speak German as my mother tongue and have a good knowledge of the English and Russian language and also a basic knowledge of French and Chinese. I am team-oriented, a quick and flexible learner with a creative mind for new ideas and improvements.
I am interested in expanding and improving my skills with xyz, due to the fact that it is an internationally renowned company. Furthermore I would be interested at gaining an insight into the Chinese business culture.
The Automotive and Industrial Technology and the production of Consumer Goods seem to me like the best areas for my internship. Within these parts I am interested in the planning of a production, the management of production, the technical distribution, research and development and Information Technology but also the department of finance is meaningful to me.
Please do not hesitate to contact me, should you have any other questions about my application. I am very much looking forward to hearing from you.
Thank you in advance.
Yours sincerely,
xyz
Ich werde geduldig auf gaaanz viele Komentare warten. Dankeschön im Voraus
PS. In der Vorschau wird der Text teilweise in blau angezeigt??? Ich konnte dies leider nicht beheben, lasst Euch bitte davon nicht stören.