Bitte um Korrektur von Summary und Characterisation

[Lisachen]

Hallo, ich schreibe morgen meine erste Englischklasur und wollte fragen, ob ihr mir vielleicht sagen könnt, was ich bei den jeweiligen Teilen vielleicht verbessern muss. Ich bin nicht wirklich gut in Englisc, das schonmal vorraus. (;

Also hier der Text
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EARLY AUTUMN
by Langston Hughes (1902-1967)

When Bill was very young, they had been in love. Many nights they had spent walking, talking together. Then something not very important had come between them, and they didn’t speak. Impulsively, she had married a man she thought she loved. Bill went away, bitter about women.

Yesterday, walking across Washington Square, she saw him for the first time in years.

“Bill Walker,” she said.
He stopped. At first he did not recognize her, to him she looked so old.
“Mary! Where did you come from?”
Unconsciously, she lifted her face as though wanting a kiss, but he held out his hand. She took it.
“I live in New York now,” she said.
“Oh” — smiling politely. Then a little frown came quickly between his eyes.
“Always wondered what happened to you, Bill.”
“I’m a lawyer. Nice firm, way downtown.”
“Married yet?”
“Sure. Two kids.”
“Oh,” she said.

A great many people went past them through the park. People they didn’t know. It was late afternoon. Nearly sunset. Cold.

“And your husband?” he asked her.
“We have three children. I work in the bursar’s office at Columbia.”
“You’re looking very . . .” (he wanted to say old) “. . . well,” he said.

She understood. Under the trees in Washington Square, she found herself desperately reaching back into the past. She had been older than he then in Ohio. Now she was not young at all. Bill was still young.

“We live on Central Park West,” she said. “Come and see us sometime.”
“Sure,” he replied. “You and your husband must have dinner with my family some night. Any night. Lucille and I’d love to have you.”

The leaves fell slowly from the trees in the Square. Fell without wind. Autumn dusk. She felt a little sick.

“We’d love it,” she answered.
“You ought to see my kids.” He grinned.

Suddenly the lights came on up the whole length of Fifth Avenue, chains of misty brilliance in the blue air.

“There’s my bus,” she said.
He held out his hand. “Good-bye.”
“When . . .” she wanted to say, but the bus was ready to pull off. The lights on the avenue blurred, twinkled, blurred. And she was afraid to open her mouth as she entered the bus. Afraid it would be impossible to utter a word.

Suddenly she shrieked very loudly. “Good-bye!” But the bus door had closed.

The bus started. People came between them outside, people crossing the street, people they didn’t know. Space and people. She lost sight of Bill. Then she remembered she had forgotten to give him her address — or to ask him for his — or tell him that her youngest boy was named Bill too.

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Summary:

The short story „Early Autumn“ by Langston Hughes (1902-1967) is about a man, called Bill and a woman named Mary.
Bill and Mary were in love wehn they were young. At that time Mary left Bill for another man but now they meet again. At the beginning Mary wants to say 'Hello' with a kiss but Bill only helds his hand out. They talk to each other and Mary narrats that she lives in New York, too. She tells about her family and her job but she seems to be frustradet and unhappy with her life. On the other hand Bill seems to be very content. He tells about his new wife and his two kids.
In Bill's eyes Mary looks very old, but he does not tell her. They invite each other to visit and at the end, when Mary's bus arrives she says goodbye but when she is in the bus, she remembers that they forgot to swich the addresses.




Characterisation:



The main character of the text „Early Autumn“ by Langston Hughes ( 1902-1967) is called Bill Walker (l. 6). He is a lawyer in New York (l. 14) and has got a wife named Lucille (l. 28). Besides he has got two kids (l. 16). In line 9 it seems as Bill is loved by Mary, a woman, who he was in love with when he was younger. But he already had forgotten Mary (l. 7). Bill was very sad because of her and for this reason he is a bit reserved (l. 36). When Mary greets Bill it seems as Mary wants a kiss from Bill but he only helds his hand out.
In line 12 you can see, that Bill Walker is a very polite man. But he is dishonest as well, because he does not say the truth certainly in deference to Mary. Actually Bill wanted to say, that Mary looks old insteadt of that he said she looks well, only because he does not want to hurt her.
Bill is very satisfied with his liefe, he is proud out of his kids (l 32) and in contrast to Mary Bill looks very young (l. 25).

[Duckduck (Contributor)]

Hi Lisachen, willkommen im Forum!

Aber doch gleich zu Beginn zwei Hinweise: zunächst sind in diesem Forum Cross Postings nicht erlaubt, wenn Du also in einem anderen Forum ein Posting bereits eingestellt hast oder einstellst und wir bekommen das mit, werden wir Deinen Text nicht korrigieren. Aber außerdem ein Tipp für die Zukunft: stelle Deine Anfrage nicht so spät ein, bzw. so knapp vor der Arbeit. Wir sitzen nicht gerade Tag und Nacht bereit und korrigieren wild drauf los, ja?

Hoffentlich lief die Klausur ganz gut. Und beachte meine Hinweise, dann klappt es nächstes mal auch...

Grüße
Duckduck

[Lisachen]

Oh, tut mir Leid, das wusste ich nicht. Kommt nicht mehr vor. (;
Dass das zu spät war, ahbe ich mir schon gedacht, aber ich bin erst gestern auf die Idee gekommen, das im Internet korrigieren zu lassen. Naja.
Jor, ich glaub wohl, dass die Klausur nicht all zu schlecht war (;

Danke für die Hinweise (: