Bitte um Korrektur

[serravina]

Hallo,

ich habe gerade dieses tolle Forum entdeckt.
Mein Englisch ist leider sauschlecht. Ich möchte mich in Afrika bewerben. Folgenden Text habe ich verfasst:


Hallo Mr. Miller,
i am glad to hear from you.
I was for ten months in Africa in a nice family. I enjoyed Afrika so much. I love to support handicapped people and currently I am working in Hamburg at a school for mentally and physically handicapped children in the first class.
I did my social education for 3 years in Germany. I supported there disabled people in their everyday life.
Are you looking for workers from Germany? I am very interested in the Miller School . Can you tell me more about the work in your school?
I am so sorry that my English is so bad but, I am working on it and hope I can improve it.

With best regards


Kann ich das so schreiben?
Ich wäre Euch sehr dankbar, wenn es mir jemand verbessern könnte!!

Liebe Grüße!

[panic22]

If I may try to help there?
First of all.. Wooow! Dein Englisch hört sich voll gar nicht schlecht an! Keep it up

Hallo,

Hallo Mr. Miller,
i am glad to hear from you.
I spent ten months in Africa in a nice host family. I enjoyed my stay in Afrika so much. I love supporting handicapped people and I am currently working in Hamburg at a school for mentally and physically handicapped children in the first form / grade.
I completed my education as a social worker in Germany 3 years ago afterward I started being supportive of disabled people in their everyday life.
Are you looking for an employee from Germany by any chance? I am very interested in the Miller School . Could you tell me more about what the work would be like at your school?
I am so sorry that my English is so bad but, I am working on it and hope I can improve it. (oooh you will! )
With best regards


Kann ich das so schreiben?
Ich wäre Euch sehr dankbar, wenn es mir jemand verbessern könnte!!

Liebe Grüße!

hihi, Ich weiss nicht in wie weit meine Verbesserungsvorschläge hilfreich sind, da ich selbst mit Bewerbungen bislang nichts zu tun hatte.. hihi
Hoffe jedoch ich war ein wenig in der Lage zu helfen ^.^
C youu

[Duckduck (Contributor)]

If I may try to help there?
First of all.. Wooow! Dein Englisch hört sich voll gar nicht schlecht an! Keep it up

Hallo,

Dear Mr. Miller,
I was delighted about hearing from you.

I spent ten months in Africa in a nice host family. I enjoyed my stay there ever so much. I love supporting handicapped people and I am currently working in Hamburg at a school for mentally and physically handicapped children in the first form / grade.
I completed my education as a social worker in Germany 3 years ago. And after that I started working with disabled people, helping them in their everyday life.

Are you looking for an employee from Germany by any chance? I am very interested in the Miller School. Could you tell me more about what the work would be like at your school?
I am so sorry that my English is quite bad, but I am working on it and I hope to improve it considerably over the coming months.
With best regards


Kann ich das so schreiben?
Ich wäre Euch sehr dankbar, wenn es mir jemand verbessern könnte!!

Liebe Grüße!

hihi, Ich weiss nicht in wie weit meine Verbesserungsvorschläge hilfreich sind, da ich selbst mit Bewerbungen bislang nichts zu tun hatte.. hihi
Hoffe jedoch ich war ein wenig in der Lage zu helfen ^.^
C youu

Hallo Beide!

Nicht alles war falsch, teilweise sind es auch nur Ausdrucksvorschlage, aber ich musste meine Korrektur ja farblich von panics absetzen.

Grüße und viel Glück!
Duckduck

[caro64]

Hi, just a small correction from little me  
 
I spent ten months in Africa in with a nice host family.
 
Bye,
Caro

[serravina]

Vielen lieben Dank! Ihr seid Klasse!!