bitte um Korrektur (Freizeitaktivität)

[saturn]

Guten Morgen.
Ich habe einen Text geschrieben, da geht es darum was meine Freizeitbeschäftigung ist( ich sollte nur eine) und was ich damit so erlebt hab.

In my freetime I often sing and dance. This I doing since 13 years. As I was 5 or 6 years old I was in a ballet school but with the time I found it boring. At the beginning I had sung only for me and for fun.As I was 16 years old, I would took part by casting-shows. In all the years I have trained so much. In the year 2003 I had take part by the Casting-show named "Popstars". It was a good experience but it was sad, too. Unfortunately I couldn't sung so good because I was ill and so I don't come further.But the whole Casting- show was a swindle because I haven't been by the right jury. I must sung in front of a woman. I think she was a singing teacher. At the beginning of this Casting I could seen the right jury. There were so many people, I think more than 2000.As I didn't come further I was very sad but I didn't given up. In the year 2004 I was by the Casting-show "DSDS" in Hamburg. I have done it because I have thought, that it could been better than the last time.But it was a swindle, too, because I haven't been by the right jury.I never have seen Dieter Bohlen. I have sung in front of three other people. They had decided, who come further. I was so sad, that I didn't come further. It was a good experience to find out, that all the Casting-shows are a big swindle. Now I would never do this again. It was a big dream of me but it only was a dream in this age. Therefore I don#t watch this Casting-shows anymore. I don't understand why the people do this. Why they allow , that other people laugh, if they sing so bad. This all had show me, that I want to have a normally work like kindergarten teacher. Now I'm singing and dancing only for fun. I think this is better. I think there are dreams, that should be only dreams.

Könnte bitte jemand korriegieren, wenn ich was falsch habe?

Vielen, vielen Dank für die Hilfe.
LG

[Keswick (Contributor)]

Guten Morgen.
Ich habe einen Text geschrieben. Da geht es darum was meine Freizeitbeschäftigung ist (ich sollte nur eine - eine was? Beschreiben? ) und was ich damit so erlebt habe.

In my free time I often sing and dance. I have been doing this for 13 years. When I was 5 or 6 years old I attended ballet school but with the time I found it boring. At the beginning I only sang for me and for fun. When I was 16 years old, I would took part in casting shows. I have trained so much in all those years. In the year 2003 I participated in the casting show called "Popstars". It was a good experience but it was sad, too. Unfortunately I couldn't sing so well because I was ill and so I did not get through to the next round. But the whole casting show was a swindle because I wasn't with the right jury. I had to sing in front of a woman. I think she was a singing teacher. At the beginning of this casting I could see the right jury. There were so many people, I think more than 2000. I was very sad about not making it to the next round but I didn't give up. In the year 2004 I was at the casting show "DSDS" in Hamburg. I went there because I thought that it might be better than the previous time. But it was a swindle, too, because I wasn't seen by the right jury. I never saw Dieter Bohlen. I have sang in front of three other people. They had decided, who would get through to the next round. I was so sad, that I didn't make it. It was a good experience to find out, that all the casting shows are a big swindle. Now I would never do this again. It was a big dream of mine but it was only a dream in this age (Das verstehe ich nicht). Therefore I don't watch this casting shows anymore. I don't understand why the people do this. Why they allow that other people to laugh when they sing so badly. This all showed me, that I want to have a normal job like nursery school teacher. Now I'm singing and dancing only for fun. I think this is better. I think there are dreams, that should only be dreams.

Könnte bitte jemand korrigieren, wenn ich was falsch habe?

Vielen, vielen Dank für die Hilfe.
LG

Hi Saturn,

ich habe die deinen Text verbessert und moechte Dir ans Herz legen, Dir die Zeiten im Englischen noch einmal anzusehen:

http://www.englisch-hilfen.de/inhalt_grammar.htm

Wenn du dazu Fragen hast, dann frage bitte.

LG
Keswick

[saturn]

vielen, vielen Dank für die Verbesserungen.
LG