Text zum korrigieren

[coach]

I would like to get a mobile phone. It's a small gadget. You can call your parents, a ambulance or the police in a accident. This gadget(device) has many features. You can play games, hear music or go with this gadget on the internet. You can take it away. You can communicate with your friends outside. Many of my friends have a mobile phone. So I need it, too.
I can send messages to my friends. When your mobile phone has a camera you can take photos very quickly. This gadget have a alarm clock. So you can use it to wake up. Many mobile phones have a carculator. So you can use it for math . It's very useful.

Es geht in dem Text darum, dass ich meine Eltern von einem Handy überzeugen soll.

Bitte korrigieren.

Brauche es dringend. Schreibe Montag die Klassenarbeit.

[joy]

WOULD YOU like to get a mobile phone? It's a small gadget. You can call your parents, AN ambulance or the police in AN accident. This gadget (device) has many features. You can play games, hear music or go with this gadget on the internet. You can take it away. You can communicate with your friends outside. Many of my friends have a mobile phone. So I need it, too.
I can send messages to my friends. When your mobile phone has a camera you can take photos very quickly. This gadget HAS AN alarm clock. So you can use it to wake up. Many mobile phones have a CALCULATOR. So you can use it for math. It's very useful.

Hi Couch
Wörter mit Fehler habe ich gross geschrieben. Vielleicht schaut es noch jemand an.
Good luck!
joy

[joy]

Dein erster Satz ist ok!

I would like to get a mobile phone.

Sorry
joy