Hallo,
ich bin es wider mal...
dieses mal musste ich einen kleinen Aufsatz schreiben, nur bin ich mir nicht ganz sicher ob das alles richtig ist, vielleicht könntet ihr ja mal was dazu sagen wegen Fehlern usw. wäre sehr nett!
Mein Text:
I was shopping in the city centre yesterday when I saw a robbery. It was laughable. Let me tell you about it.
As I said, he came out from the Shop in the city centre and the robber was running like a raving loony. Close to the city centre went an elderly lady along the pavement, in this moment came the robber and ran down the lady. The lady was so angered about this incident, took the umbrella and beat him to the head. In the panic ran the robber across the street and failed to notice the coming car. The robber was on the ground of the street, and could not get up because his leg was broken. In this moment came the police and arrested the robber.
lg.
erwin
Aufsatz?
-
eismann
-
Delfino
Well, having some confidence is good and sometimes necessary,Hallo nochmal,
nachdem ich leider keine Antwort auf meine Frage erhalten habe gehe ich davon aus
das alles in Ordnung ist...
but as you probably know your English skills are still limited.
Therefore you should know too that there is a high probability
we may be able to find a few mistakes in your draft.
Your second post was less than ten hours after your first one.
Please show some patience!
We are not responsible for your homework...
Our / my response to your request is restricted
due to the current forum rules ...
Forumregeln
Did you read your draft before posting it here?Wir sind kein Übersetzungsdienst und erledigen auch nicht eure Hausaufgaben.
Beiträge, die solche Anfragen enthalten, werden kommentarlos gelöscht.
...
Habt etwas Geduld und antwortet nicht auf eure eigenen Beiträge mit
z. B. „Warum hilft mir keiner“ oder „Ich brauche dringend Hilfe“ etc.
...
Bitte überprüft eure Beiträge vor der Übertragung auf Rechtschreib- und Grammatikfehler.
Typos like this one tell us a different story:
e.g. shop
-
Delfino
Re: Aufsatz?
You said nothing before... Which shopeismann hat geschrieben:Hallo,
ich bin es wieder einmal...
Dieses Mal muss ich einen kleinen Aufsatz schreiben.
Nur bin ich mir nicht ganz sicher ob das alles richtig ist.
Vielleicht könntet ihr ja mal was dazu sagen - wegen Fehlern usw.
Es wäre sehr nett!
Mein Text:
I was shopping in the city centre when I saw a robbery yesterday.
It was funny. Let me tell you ... about it.
As I said, he came out of the shop in the city centre and the robber was running like a raving loony. Close to the city centre went an elderly lady along the pavement, in this moment came the robber and ran down the lady. The lady was so angered about this incident, ... took the umbrella and beat him on the head. Inthepanic ran the robber across the street and failed to notice the coming car. The robber was onthe ground ofthe street ..., and ... could not get up because his leg was broken. In this moment came the police and arrested the robber.
LG
Erwin
Please don't use slang in an essay.
... means you need to insert a word to complete the sentence.
Please read this article http://www.englisch-hilfen.de/grammar/s ... lung_1.htm
to fix your mistakes
-
eismann
Hallo Delfino,
ich habe den Text noch einmal geändert:
Dear Pam,
I was shopping in the city centre yesterday when I saw a robbery. It was laughable. Let me tell you about it.
I came out from the Shop in the city centre and the robber was running like a sprinter along the pavement. Close to the city centre an elderly lady went the pavement along, in this moment the robber came and ran down the lady. The lady was about this incident so angered, took the umbrella and beat him to the head. In panic the robber ran across the street and failed to notice the car that came along the street. The robber was on the street, and could not get up because his leg was broken. Shortly after, the police came and arrested the robber.
So, that's the story about the robber, next week I will frequent you at home. See you…
With best wishes
erwin
ich habe den Text noch einmal geändert:
Dear Pam,
I was shopping in the city centre yesterday when I saw a robbery. It was laughable. Let me tell you about it.
I came out from the Shop in the city centre and the robber was running like a sprinter along the pavement. Close to the city centre an elderly lady went the pavement along, in this moment the robber came and ran down the lady. The lady was about this incident so angered, took the umbrella and beat him to the head. In panic the robber ran across the street and failed to notice the car that came along the street. The robber was on the street, and could not get up because his leg was broken. Shortly after, the police came and arrested the robber.
So, that's the story about the robber, next week I will frequent you at home. See you…
With best wishes
erwin
-
Delfino
I see my hints were not enough help for you
to fix all the mistakes yourself.
So here is a fully reviewed version of your last text.
I marked my changes in red.
Dear Pam,
I was shopping in the city centre when I saw a robbery yesterday.
It was really funny to look at. Let me tell you more about it.
I came out of a shop in the city centre, when I saw the robber running
like a sprinter on the pavement. Close to the city centre an elderly lady
was walking on the pavement too. In this moment the robber came
and he ran down the lady. The lady was so angry about this incident,
that she took her umbrella and started beating him on his head.
In panic the robber tried to run across the street, but he failed to notice
the approaching car and was suddenly hit by it. Now the robber layed
on the street, and he could not get up because his leg was broken.
Shortly afterwards the police came and arrested the injured robber.
So, this is the story about the stupid robber.
Next week I will frequently be at home.
I'll see you then.
With best wishes,
Erwin
to fix all the mistakes yourself.
So here is a fully reviewed version of your last text.
I marked my changes in red.
Dear Pam,
I was shopping in the city centre when I saw a robbery yesterday.
It was really funny to look at. Let me tell you more about it.
I came out of a shop in the city centre, when I saw the robber running
like a sprinter on the pavement. Close to the city centre an elderly lady
was walking on the pavement too. In this moment the robber came
and he ran down the lady. The lady was so angry about this incident,
that she took her umbrella and started beating him on his head.
In panic the robber tried to run across the street, but he failed to notice
the approaching car and was suddenly hit by it. Now the robber layed
on the street, and he could not get up because his leg was broken.
Shortly afterwards the police came and arrested the injured robber.
So, this is the story about the stupid robber.
Next week I will frequently be at home.
I'll see you then.
With best wishes,
Erwin
-
eismann