Korrekturlesen bei meinem essay

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learner

Korrekturlesen bei meinem essay

Beitrag von learner »

Hallo an Alle,

Ich habe mich eben erst regstriert und schon eine grosse Bitte an Euch. :|

ich bin alles andere als gut in Englisch und ich muss/darf bis Freitag ein essay ueber Fussball schreiben und wollte Euch fragen,ob ich Euch mein geschriebenes hier nach und nach reinstellen kann und ihr einen Blick raufwerfen koenntet.

Es braucht gar keine grosse "Korrigierorgie" sein,jeder Fehler weniger hilft mir schon :o


Eine Einleitung haette ich auch "schon".

My theme in this essay is football,i am a big fan of this sport for a lot of years.
I am going to write about the history and development of football,laws of the game,commercial relevance and about famous teams and players.
My focus will be the importance of football nowadays.


Also,wie gesagt,waere klasse,wenn ihr einen kurzen Blick auf meine Einleitung und den demnaechst nachfolgenden Texten waerfen koenntet...

Nevermore

Beitrag von Nevermore »

Hi learner,

da es sich hier in erster Linie um ein Hilfe-Forum handelt, wird's Reinstellen schon kein Problem sein :wink:
Zur Einleitung: Ein bisschen was ist mir schon aufgefallen.

My theme in this essay is football


Besser wäre: My essay is about football. Nebenbei ist das englische Wort für "Thema" in diesem Fall "topic".

[...]laws of the game[...]

Hier wäre "rules" das korrekte Wort. "Laws" bezieht sich auf das Gesetz.

...ansonsten würde ICH den Rest erstmal so stehen lassen. Vielleicht meldet sich ja noch wer anders zu Wort.

learner

Beitrag von learner »

danke erstmal Nevermore :P

Wenn ich in diesen kleinen Abschnitt schon so viele Fehler hab,dann hab ich Angst vor den laengeren :lol:

naja,hier habe ich den naechsten kleinen Abschnitt

The modern football game were created in England.
The Football Association has configured the rules in 1863.
Since 1863 those rules has permanently changed.

But what is Football?
Football is a team sport. There are two teams of eleven players.
They play with a ball and try to score goals. Normally,a game lasts<--? 90 minutes.
In team- or worldchampionships the game can goes into a extra-time and/or penalty-shootout.

The referee controls whether the rules are respected<--?
If a player does to many or to hard fouls the referee can distribute yellow or red cards.
With red cards he can sending-off player. If a player has been sent-off, no substitute can be brought on in their place.
If a player does a fouls in penalty area the opposite team get a penalty.
Ordinary fouls will only punished with a free kick.

The referees will support by linesmen.
They have do decide whether a player is in offside or not.

Danke schon mal im vorraus.

Nevermore

Beitrag von Nevermore »

The modern football game was created in England.
The Football Association has configured the rules in 1863.
Since 1863 those rules have permanently changed.

But what is Football?
Football is a team sport. There are two teams of eleven players.
They play with a ball and try to score goals. Normally,a game lasts ( :tup: ) 90 minutes.
In team or world championships the game can go into an extra time and/or penalty shootout.

The referee controls whether the rules are respected ( :tup: ).
If a player fouls too often or too hard, the referee can distribute yellow or red cards.
With red cards he can send off players. If a player has been sent off, no substitute can be brought on in his place.
If a player fouls in the penalty area the opposite team gets a penalty.
Ordinary fouls are only punished with a free kick.

The referees are supported by linesmen.
They have to decide whether a player is in offside position or not.

...nicht schlecht, nicht schlecht. Jemand mit etwas mehr "Fachkenntnis" wär langsam trotzdem ganz nützlich^^ (allein schon wegen der Kommasetzung...) "Laws of the game" scheint es übrigens tatsächlich zu geben. Scheint mir aber mehr ne Art Niederschrift der Spielregeln zu sein. Je nachdem, was du meinst, kann's also genauso gut richtig sein. Die Spielregeln selbst würde ich allerdings trotzdem mit "rules" übersetzen - fährste eher mit auf der sicheren Schiene :tongue:

learner

Beitrag von learner »

hi,endlich ist die Schule aus :D

Erstmal noch ein Dankeschoen an dir.
Wie oben schon gesagt,hilft mir jeder entdeckte Fehler.Ihr/du koennt auch posten wenn ich nen i-punkt vergessen habe :wink:

Gestern Abend konnte ich,wegen den anderen Hausaufgaben,nicht mehr viel machen.
Das ist der derzeitige Stand(mit deiner Korrektur und ein paar weiteren Ergaenzungen)


My essay is about football,because I am a big fan of this sport for a lot of years.
I am going to write about the history and development of football,rules of the game,commercial relevance and about famous teams and players.
My focus will be the importance of football nowadays.


The modern football game was created in England.
The Football Association has configured the rules in 1863.
Since 1863 those rules have permanently changed.

But what is Football?
Football is a team sport. There are two teams of eleven players.
They play with a ball and try to score goals. Normally,a game lasts 90 minutes.
In team or world championships the game can go into an extra time and/or penalty shootout.


There are four positions in football:
-the goalkeeper who defend his goal. Goalkeepers are the only players whose is allowed to take the ball with their hands.
-the defender who tries to prevent scores for the opposite team
-the midfielders who supports the defenders and pass the ball to the forwards
-the forward who has the task to score goals.


The referee controls whether the rules are respected.
If a player fouls too often or too hard, the referee can distribute yellow or red cards.
With red cards he can send off players. If a player has been sent off, no substitute can be brought on in his place.
If a player fouls in the penalty area the opposite team gets a penalty.
Ordinary fouls are only punished with a free kick.

The referees are supported by linesmen.
They have to decide whether a player is in offside position or not.


Those rules have been compose in "Laws of the Game"
It currently comprises seventeen laws:

* Law 1: The Field of Play
* Law 2: The Ball
* Law 3: The Number of Players
* Law 4: The Players' Equipment
* Law 5: The Referee
* Law 6: The Assistant Referees
* Law 7: The Duration of the Match
* Law 8: The Start and Restart of Play
* Law 9: The Ball In and Out of Play
* Law 10: The Method of Scoring
* Law 11: Offside
* Law 12: Fouls and Misconduct
* Law 13: Free Kicks
* Law 14: The Penalty Kick
* Law 15: The Throw-In
* Law 16: The Goal Kick
* Law 17: The Corner Kick


(blau=Ergaenzungen)

learner

Beitrag von learner »

sooo,schade,dass sich noch keiner gemeldet hat... :(

Ich habe in der Zwischenzeit weitergemacht,fehlen tut auch nicht mehr viel,nur werden da sicherlich einige Fehler drin sein.
Es waere wirklich sehhhhr klasse,wenn da vielleicht der Ein oder Andere rueberschauen koennte...

Bei um den 80 Aufrufen wird doch da einer bei gewesen sein,der Fehler entdeckt hat :|

Habt ein Herz :lol:


My essay is about football,because I am a big fan of this sport for a lot of years.
I am going to write about the history and development of football,rules of the game,commercial relevance and about famous teams and players.
My focus will be the importance of football nowadays.


The modern football game was created in England.
The Football Association has configured the rules in 1863.
Since 1863 those rules have permanently changed.

But what is Football?
Football is a team sport. There are two teams of eleven players.
They play with a ball and try to score goals. Normally,a game lasts 90 minutes.
In team or world championships the game can go into an extra time and/or penalty shootout.
There are four positions in football:
-the goalkeeper who defend his goal. Goalkeepers are the only players whose is allowed to take the ball with their hands.
-the defender who tries to prevent scores for the opposite team
-the midfielders who supports the defenders and pass the ball to the forwards
-the forward who has the task to score goals.

The referee controls whether the rules are respected.
If a player fouls too often or too hard, the referee can distribute yellow or red cards.
With red cards he can send off players. If a player has been sent off, no substitute can be brought on in his place.
If a player fouls in the penalty area the opposite team gets a penalty.
Ordinary fouls are only punished with a free kick.

The referees are supported by linesmen.
They have to decide whether a player is in offside position or not.


Those rules have been compose in "Laws of the Game"
It currently comprises seventeen laws:

* Law 1: The Field of Play
* Law 2: The Ball
* Law 3: The Number of Players
* Law 4: The Players' Equipment
* Law 5: The Referee
* Law 6: The Assistant Referees
* Law 7: The Duration of the Match
* Law 8: The Start and Restart of Play
* Law 9: The Ball In and Out of Play
* Law 10: The Method of Scoring
* Law 11: Offside
* Law 12: Fouls and Misconduct
* Law 13: Free Kicks
* Law 14: The Penalty Kick
* Law 15: The Throw-In
* Law 16: The Goal Kick
* Law 17: The Corner Kick

The earliest form of football is "Cuju".It means "kick ball".
The people in China have been played that game in the 2nd and 3rd century.
Cuju had have some similarities to the modern football.

The origin of football in Europe started on the mid 19th century.
In 1848 the Cambridge University have established some rules,the "Cambridge Rules".
Those rules were the basis for the modern football rules,the "Laws of the Game",which were created and established in 1863 by The Football Association(see above).

In 1886 the International Football Association Board(IFAB) was established.
The IFAB commited the laws of the game as official set of regulations.
Two years later,the first football leaque was formed.
In 1904 the international Football organisation was established in Paris.

Nowadays, football is once of the most played games in the world.
Since 1930 there are world championships which do takeing place every four years.
Since 1960 there are also european championships.
They taking place every four years,too.

Anymore the commercial relevance of football is very indeed.
Football matches are going to televise in more and more countries.
So,firms make a lot of money out of those televison coverages,if they hold the rights.
For example,public broadcasters in germany payed 9 million Euros in 1887/88 to coverage the Fussball Bundesliga.
In 1997/98 the german tv station Sat1 had already payed 90 million Euro.
The coverages of footballmatches is the importance source of revenue.

Furthermore more and more people attend football matches.
Due to the football championship 2006 in Germany,many stadiums have been modernized.
Therefor these stadiums are one of the modern stadiums in the world.

More over fans of football clubs buy a lot of fan articles.


One of the famous clubs in the world is Manchester United.
Manchester United was several years the club with the highest revenue of any football clubs in the world.
They won a lot of titles.
For example,they have won 18 Major honours,16 times the Premier Leaque and 11 times the Fa Cup.
Furthermore,they got the first Englisch club,which won the European Cup in 1968.
With more than 30 million members Manchester United is the most popular football club in the world.
Currently, a couple of "stars"(players whose are very popular)
are playing for Manchester United like Christiano Ronaldo,Wayne Rooney and Ryan Giggs.

Another very famous club is(???) Real Madrid.
Since 2005 Real Madrid is the club with the highest revenue of any football clubs in the world.
They are probably the most famous club in the world.
They have won oodles of titles and many of the best players in the world are playing here.
For example Real Madrid won 9 time the European Championship and 30 times the spanish league.
Naturally,stars like Raul,Iker Casillas,Ruud van Nistelrooy and Fabio Cannavaro.
According to the Fifa Real Madrid is the best team of the 20th century.


Das ist der derzeitige Stand...
Wie gesagt,waere toll,wenn ihr mich morgen nach der Schule positiv ueberraschen wuerdet :D

Nevermore

Beitrag von Nevermore »

Sooo... da bin ich auch wieder.

My essay is about football,because I am a big fan of this sport for a lot of years.
I am going to write about the history and development of football,rules of the game,commercial relevance and about famous teams and players.
My focus will be the importance of football nowadays.


The modern football game was created in England.
The Football Association has configured the rules in 1863.
Since 1863 those rules have permanently changed.

But what is Football?
Football is a team sport. There are two teams of eleven players.
They play with a ball and try to score goals. Normally,a game lasts 90 minutes.
In team or world championships the game can go into an extra time and/or penalty shootout.
There are four positions in football:
-the goalkeeper, who defends his goal. Goalkeepers are the only players who are allowed to take the ball with their hands.
-the defender, who tries to prevent scores for the opposite team
-the midfielders, who support the defenders and pass the ball to the forwards
-the forward, who has the task to score goals.

The referee controls whether the rules are respected.
If a player fouls too often or too hard, the referee can distribute yellow or red cards.
With red cards he can send off players. If a player has been sent off, no substitute can be brought on in his place.
If a player fouls in the penalty area the opposite team gets a penalty.
Ordinary fouls are only punished with a free kick.

The referees are supported by linesmen.
They have to decide whether a player is in offside position or not.


The following rules have been composed in "Laws of the Game" (An dieser Stelle vielleicht eine Erklärung, worum es sich dabei überhaupt handelt? Außerdem bin ich mir bei diesem Satz nicht ganz sicher.)
It currently comprises seventeen laws:

* Law 1: The Field of Play
* Law 2: The Ball
* Law 3: The Number of Players
* Law 4: The Players' Equipment
* Law 5: The Referee
* Law 6: The Assistant Referees
* Law 7: The Duration of the Match
* Law 8: The Start and Restart of Play
* Law 9: The Ball In and Out of Play
* Law 10: The Method of Scoring
* Law 11: Offside
* Law 12: Fouls and Misconduct
* Law 13: Free Kicks
* Law 14: The Penalty Kick
* Law 15: The Throw-In
* Law 16: The Goal Kick
* Law 17: The Corner Kick

The earliest form of football is "Cuju".It means "kick ball".
The people in China have been playing that game in the 2nd and 3rd century.
Cuju had some similarities to modern football. (Am besten ohne "the" ^^)

The origin of football in Europe started on the mid 19th century.
In 1848 the Cambridge University has established some rules,the "Cambridge Rules".
Those rules were the basis for the rules of modern football,the "Laws of the Game",which were created and established in 1863 by The Football Association(see above).

In 1886 the International Football Association Board(IFAB) was established.
The IFAB committed the laws of the game as official set of regulations.
Two years later,the first football league (...wenn auch nur vertippt) was formed.
In 1904 the international Football organisation was established in Paris.

Nowadays, football is one of the most played games in the world.
Since 1930 there are world championships which take place every four years.
Since 1960 there are also European championships.
They take place every four years,too.

Anymore the commercial relevance of football is very indeed. (Den Satz versteh' ich nich' ^^)
Football matches are going to be televised in more and more countries.
So (Komma würd' ich weglassen) firms make a lot of money out of those televison coverages,if they hold the rights.
For example,public broadcasters in Germany payed 9 million Euros in 1887/88 to coverage the Fussball Bundesliga.
In 1997/98 the German tv station Sat1 had already payed 90 million Euro.
The coverages of football matches are the importance source of revenue.

Furthermore, more and more people attend football matches.
Due to the football championship 2006 in Germany,many stadiums have been modernised.
Therefor(e) these stadiums are one of the (most) modern stadiums in the world.

More over ( :question: ) fans of football clubs buy a lot of fan articles. (Versteh' ich auch nicht ganz)


...an der Stelle mach ich erstma'n Punkt. Ick werd müde :| Morgen geht's aber weiter.

learner

Beitrag von learner »

man,man,man,was wuerde ich ohne dich machen :D
vielen dank,dass du dich da gestern abend noch ran gesetzt hast.

ich kann heute leider nicht weiterschreiben,da ich morgen noch eine matheklausur hab :rolleyes:


Anymore the commercial relevance of football is very indeed. (Den Satz versteh' ich nich' ^^)
jo,war mir bei dem auch nicht ueberhaupt nicht sicher.
was ich eigentlich sagen wollte war,dass die wirtschafltiche bedeutung von fussball sehr hoch ist.
fuer sehr hoch wurde mich very indeed ausgespuckt
hab echt keine ahnung wie man das schreiben soll...

naja,alles im allem ein doofer satz :lol:

Nevermore

Beitrag von Nevermore »

Keine Ursache :wink: Gucken wir mal erst, was nach der Kontrolle durch den Lehrer rauskommt.

Football is of great economic / commercial importance.
Football matches are going to be televised in more and more countries.
So firms make a lot of money out of those televison coverages,if they hold the rights.
For example,public broadcasters in Germany payed 9 million Euros in 1887/88 to coverage the Fussball Bundesliga.
In 1997/98 the German tv station Sat1 had already payed 90 million Euro.
The coverages of football matches are the importance source of revenue.

Furthermore, more and more people attend football matches.
Due to the football championship 2006 in Germany,many stadiums have been modernised.
Therefor(e) these stadiums are one of the (most) modern stadiums in the world.

More over ( :question: ) fans of football clubs buy a lot of fan articles. (Versteh' ich auch nicht ganz)

One of the (most) famous clubs in the world is Manchester United.
Manchester United was several years the club with the highest revenue of any football club in the world.
They won a lot of titles.
For example,they have won 18 Major honours,16 times the Premier League and 11 times the Fa Cup.
Furthermore,they became the first Englisch club,which (has) won the European Cup in 1968.
With more than 30 million members, Manchester United is the most popular football club in the world. (Etwas doppelt gemoppelt? ^^ Siehe ein paar Zeilen weiter oben...)
Currently, a couple of "stars"(players who are very popular)
are playing for Manchester United, like Christiano Ronaldo,Wayne Rooney and Ryan Giggs.

Another very famous club is ( :tup: ) Real Madrid.
Since 2005 Real Madrid is the club with the highest revenue of any football club in the world.
It's probably the most famous club in the world. (War das nicht schon Manchester United?)
They have won oodles of titles and many of the best players in the world are playing here.
For example Real Madrid won 9 time the European Championship and 30 times the spanish league.
Naturally,stars like Raul,Iker Casillas,Ruud van Nistelrooy and Fabio Cannavaro. (Ist das der ganze Satz? :tongue: )
According to the Fifa, Real Madrid is the best team of the 20th century.

Damit sind meine Hausaufgaben für heute erledigt :big_thumb:

learner

Beitrag von learner »

puh,an manchen stellen merkt man echt,dass ich,je spaeter es wird,immer unkonzentrierter werden...
Damit sind meine Hausaufgaben für heute erledigt Big Thumb
naja,ich hoffe,dass du heute abend vielleicht noch mal die ein oder andere minute zeit fuer mich hast.
ein kleines bisschen fehlt noch.
werde mich gleich ransetzen.

falls nicht,trotzdem ein dickes danke fuer deine muehen :tup:

learner

Beitrag von learner »

so,laaang hats gedauert.irgentwie haben mir die ideen gefehlt.
naja,wenn du das noch durchgucken koenntest waere das sehr klasse :mrgreen:
ich muss den ganzen kram naemlich noch handschriftlich abschreiben.


das ist mein schluss

I described the football in its entirety.Now,I will give a resume paired with my own opinion and experience.


Obviously the importance of football has grown steadily in the past years.
Not only for economy,but(sondern,hier richtig?)also for people.
For many people it is more than just a game or hobby.It is passion.
They spend their weekends with trips to away games.
They buy expensive fan articles and stadium tickets.
And a lot of young children are dreaming about a career as a football player.

Also, Football can bring people closer.
A good example is the last World Championship here in Germany in 2006.
People from many different countries celebrated victories or grieved losses together.
Every weekend many people meet to watch the matches with friends.

The one negative aspect is that many football players become mercenaries.
Of course,money play in important part in life but their profession should be play a major part.

In spite of everything there are more good as negative aspects.

Nevermore

Beitrag von Nevermore »

Ich hab' heute selbst leider noch 'ne menge zu tun, deshalb überflieg' ich nur flott.

I described ("the" ruhig weglassen) football in its entirety. Now,I will give a resume paired with my own opinion and experience.


Obviously the importance of football has steadily grown during the past years.
Not only for economy,but ( :tup: ) also for (the) people.
For many people it is more than just a game or hobby. It is passion.
They spend their weekends with trips to away games.
They buy expensive fan articles and stadium tickets.
And a lot of young children are dreaming about a career as a football player.

Also, Football can bring people closer.
A good example is the last World Championship here in Germany in 2006.
People from many different countries celebrated victories or grieved losses together.
Every weekend many people meet to watch the matches with friends. (Bezogen auf die WM? Wenn ja: "Many people met every weekend to watch the matches with friends.")

One ("the" würd' ich weglassen) negative aspect is that many football players become mercenaries.
Of course,money plays an important part in life but their profession should be play a major part. (Vielleicht einfach "should be more important"?)

In spite of everything, there are more good than negative aspects.

Ansonsten macht das ganze auf mich nen brauchbaren Eindruck. Würd' generell 'nen bisschen am Satzbau arbeiten^^ ICH finde an groben Schnitzern aber jedenfalls nichts mehr. Bleibt nurnoch ein "Viel Glück!" :big_thumb:

learner

Beitrag von learner »

soo,hab das ding heute abgegeben.
wenn ich es wiederbekomme, werde ich die korrigierte fassung mal hier reinstellen.
vielleicht hilft sie dem ein oder anderen ja weiter :tongue:

also,nochmal ein dickes dankeschoen an dich,nevermore. :tup: