Korrektur

[Gades]

Hallo,

ich würde mich gewaltig freuen wenn jemand den folgenden Text mal kurz auf Feheler durchsieht.
Da es ja ein Bewerbungsschreiben ist, möchte ich möglichst grobe Fehler vermeiden.

Habt vielen Dank

Hello,

I would be very, very glad, if someone could have a short look on the following text
to find mistakes.

Thank you very much



Dear Dr. ...,


I am searching for a medical-experimental doctoral thesis for my M.D.-doctorate, which I would like to begin in September or October, 2007.

I am a student of the medicine in the 2nd clinical semestre at the medical faculty of Dresden and would like to connect my doctoral thesis with abroad experience for a half- or one year in Switzerland in particular in Zurich.

Profound knowledge and strong interest in microbiology as well as the willingness to familarize myself with a certain subject, I will bring along as a matter of course.

If you have to award subjects for a medical thesis and like to support my plan, I would be very glad. In this case, please send to me possible subjects.

Yours sincerely,

Sebastian Kirsch

[DanTheMan]

Dear Dr. ...,


I am searching a oder I am looking for a medical-experimental doctoral thesis for my M.D.-doctorate, which I would like to begin in September or October, 2007.

I am a medicine student in the 2nd clinical semestre at the medical faculty of Dresden and would like to connect my doctoral thesis with abroad experience for a half- or one year in Switzerland in particular in Zurich.

Profound knowledge and strong interest in microbiology as well as the willingness to familarize myself with a certain subject, I will bring along as a matter of course.

If you have to award subjects for a medical thesis and like to support my plan, I would be very glad. In this case, please send to me possible subjects.

Yours sincerely,

Sebastian Kirsch

Die Dinge die ich anders machen würde habe ich rot markiert.
Zur ersten korrektur ist zu sagen, dass ich mir nicht sicher bin ob man, wie du es geschrieben hast, "searching for sth." sagt. Das "for" kenn ich im zusammenhang mit suchen nur von "looking for".