Letter of motivation

[sunnysmile9]

Hallo ihr Lieben,
ich bin gerade dabei, einen letter of motivation für ein Auslandssemester zu schreiben. Ich finde,etwas fehlt und würde mich freuen,wenn ihr mal drüber lesen könntet und meine Grammatikfehler korrigieren könntet.
Vielen Dank schonmal !


Dear Sir or Madam,
I hereby wish to state my interest for a place in your study abroad program for undergraduate students, commencing in Semester 2, 2016.

My name is (...) and I am currently starting my 4th Semester of studying International Business Administration at the (...) in (...), Germany. From this semester onwards I will focus my studies on Human Resources and Information & Operations Management.

The decision to study in Australia sparked during my Work&Travel- year 2012/13 where I have stayed mostly on the west coast. Spending a semester abroad is mandatory for my studies and it was clear that (...) University would become my first choice as I have met several international students of your university who were immensely satisfied and highly recommend it. Furthermore you offer interesting human resources courses in Semester 2 which I would feel honoured to attend and which would be an excellent addition to the courses at my university at home.

Another reason to choose Australia is the international flair due to the different nationalities not only in (city) itself but at (uni) as well. It would give me a chance to experience the city from a different perspective and I believe spending time with people from all over the world is incredibly informative and rewarding.

After finishing my bachelor degree I want to work in Human Resources at an international company, preferably specialized in logistics. The experience I will gain from studying abroad will help me with working together with people from different backgrounds as well as improved English speaking and writing skills.


Thank you for considering my request and I am looking forward to hear from you soon.

Yours faithfully,

[Keswick (Contributor)]

Hallo ihr Lieben,
ich bin gerade dabei, einen letter of motivation für ein Auslandssemester zu schreiben. Ich finde,etwas fehlt und würde mich freuen,wenn ihr mal drüber lesen könntet und meine Grammatikfehler korrigieren könntet.
Vielen Dank schonmal !


Dear Sir or Madam,

I hereby wish to state my interest in a place in your study abroad program for undergraduate students, commencing in semester 2, 2016.

My name is (...) and I am currently in my 4th semester of studying International Business Administration at the (...) in (...), Germany. From this semester onwards I will focus my studies on Human Resources and Information & Operations Management.

The decision to study in Australia sparked during my Work&Travel year in 2012/13, where I have spent most of my time staying on the West Coast. Spending a semester abroad is mandatory for my studies and it was clear that (...) University would be my first choice as I have met several international students of your university, who were immensely satisfied with studying at (uni) and highly recommended it. Furthermore you offer interesting human resources courses in semester 2 which I would feel honoured to attend and which would be an excellent addition to the courses at my university at home.

Another reason to choose Australia is the international flair due to the different nationalities not only in (city) itself but at (uni) as well. It would give me a chance to experience the city from a different perspective and I believe spending time with people from all over the world is incredibly informative and rewarding.

After finishing my bachelor degree I want to work in Human Resources at an international company, preferably specialized in logistics. The experience I will gain from studying abroad will help me in regards to working with people from different backgrounds as well as improve my English speaking and writing skills. (das wuerde ich etwas mehr ausfuehren - du wirst sicherlich noch mehr aus einem Auslandsaufenhalt herausholen koennen. Kommunikation mit Menschen anderer Kulturen und bessere Englischkenntnisse sind wichtig, aber ich glaube nicht, dass diese beiden Beispiele die Uni ueberzeugen, dich zu nehmen, denn um ehrlich zu sein muss man fuer deine beiden Beispiele nicht unbedingt an eine Uni in Australien. Versuche hier Beispiele zu finden, wo die Uni dir direkt helfen kann: suche z.B. ein Kursangebot heraus, das dir direkt bei deinem Vorhaben in HR zu arbeiten helfen kann etc. - irgend etwas fuer das du nach Australien an gerade diese Uni musst)


Thank you for considering my request and I am looking forward to hearing from you soon.

Yours faithfully,