Speech about migration

[AP2000]

Hey!

Could you please check the text below, please?

Migration and its consequences

• When we talk about refugees, we primarily think about refugees, people that flee from war, from evil, people that need our help, all the help they can get and we can provide them with.
• We also think of economic refugees that flee from their country because they believe they can live a better life in countries like Germany, Austria or Sweden, which are economically stronger.
• But there is more to migration than just that:
• Migration isn't just about refugees, it doesn't just have its dark side of many problems, it isn't just a weight on our shoulders which we carry around everywhere we go.
• It provides us with something we need:
• People move from different countries to be able to work so that they can feed their families back home so that they have enough to survive . It gives us labour we need, as no American or German would go and work on a farm or do other jobs which most people consider being beneath their dignity. Or would you go and work on a farm for $15 per day? I don't think so, and honestly, I wouldn't either! But many people from other countries have no problem doing that, as they would get paid even less in their country of origin, or not at all. So they earn enough money. And these people don't make us any trouble, they save us trouble. They are there to help us.
• That also means that we have to treat them well, we have to treat them with the respect and gratitude that is their due.
• There is just one problem: There are many people who disapprove of letting immigrants into our country, that treat immigrants as if they weren't good enough for them or for their country.
• But we have to get the world to treat all people the same, no matter where they come from, how they look, or what accent they have, when they speak. Because the variety of cultures is significant, especially for society. It brings all kinds of ways of life to one single point. It shows us how different people are, and how different people live at the other side of the world because the bring their way of living to us. And we bring our way of living to them.
• We have to accept immigrants, as they are a great part of our society which will become even bigger as the globalisation goes on.

Thank you!

PS: I have to hold it as a speech, o you have any tips on how to structure it better? 

[Schuyler]

Migration and its consequences

• When we talk about refugees, we primarily think about refugees, people who flee from war and evil: people who need our help, all the help they can get and that we can provide them with.
• We also think of economic refugees who flee from their country because they believe they can live a better life in other countries, like Germany, Austria or Sweden, which are economically stronger.
• But there is more to migration than just that:
• Migration isn't just about refugees. It isn't just a negative thing with nothing but problems, and it isn't just a weight on our shoulders which we carry around everywhere we go. [This works best as two or three shorter sentences instead of one long one.]
• It provides us with something we need:
• People move from different countries to be able to work so that they can feed their families back home and have enough to survive. It gives us labour we need, as no American or German would go and work on a farm or do other jobs which most people consider as being beneath their dignity. [Or: "... which most people consider beneath their dignity."] Or would you go and work on a farm for only $15 per day? I don't think so, and honestly, I wouldn't either! But many people from other countries have no problem doing that, as they would get paid even less or not at all in their country of origin. So, they can earn enough money by working in a different country. And these people don't give us any trouble: they save us trouble. They are there to help us.
• That also means that we have to treat them well. We have to treat them with the respect and gratitude that is their due.
• There is just one problem: there are many people who disapprove of letting immigrants into our country and treat immigrants as if they aren't good enough for those people or for their country.
• But we have to get the world to treat all people the same, no matter where they come from, how they look, or what accent they have [no comma] when they speak because the variety of cultures is significant, especially for society. It brings many different ways of life to one single point. It shows us how different people are, and how different people live on the other side of the world because they bring their way of living to us. And we bring our way of living to them.
• We have to accept immigrants, as they are a great part of our society, which will become even bigger as the globalisation goes on.

If you want to write a long sentence with more than one independent clause, you cannot connect them with only commas. For example, you cannot say "That also means that we have to treat them well, we have to treat them with the respect and gratitude that is their due." These are two independent clauses that can each stand alone as a separate sentence. A comma is not "strong" enough to link the two sentences together: you need to use something stronger, such as a conjunction or a semi-colon, or keep the two sentences separate.

Here are a few possible ways you could write this sentence:

• "That also means that we have to treat them well; we have to treat them with the respect and gratitude that is their due."
  "That also means that we have to treat them well. We have to treat them with the respect and gratitude that is their due."
  "That also means that we have to treat them well by giving them the respect and gratitude that is their due."

[AP2000]

Migration and its consequences

• When we talk about refugees, we primarily think about refugees, people who flee from war and evil: people who need our help, all the help they can get and that we can provide them with.
• We also think of economic refugees who flee from their country because they believe they can live a better life in other countries, like Germany, Austria or Sweden, which are economically stronger.
• But there is more to migration than just that:
• Migration isn't just about refugees. It isn't just a negative thing with nothing but problems, and it isn't just a weight on our shoulders which we carry around everywhere we go. [This works best as two or three shorter sentences instead of one long one.]
• It provides us with something we need:
• People move from different countries to be able to work so that they can feed their families back home and have enough to survive. It gives us labour we need, as no American or German would go and work on a farm or do other jobs which most people consider as being beneath their dignity. [Or: "... which most people consider beneath their dignity."] Or would you go and work on a farm for only $15 per day? I don't think so, and honestly, I wouldn't either! But many people from other countries have no problem doing that, as they would get paid even less or not at all in their country of origin. So, they can earn enough money by working in a different country. And these people don't give us any trouble: they save us trouble. They are there to help us.
• That also means that we have to treat them well. We have to treat them with the respect and gratitude that is their due.
• There is just one problem: there are many people who disapprove of letting immigrants into our country and treat immigrants as if they aren't good enough for those people or for their country.
• But we have to get the world to treat all people the same, no matter where they come from, how they look, or what accent they have [no comma] when they speak because the variety of cultures is significant, especially for society. It brings many different ways of life to one single point. It shows us how different people are, and how different people live on the other side of the world because they bring their way of living to us. And we bring our way of living to them.
• We have to accept immigrants, as they are a great part of our society, which will become even bigger as the globalisation goes on.

If you want to write a long sentence with more than one independent clause, you cannot connect them with only commas. For example, you cannot say "That also means that we have to treat them well, we have to treat them with the respect and gratitude that is their due." These are two independent clauses that can each stand alone as a separate sentence. A comma is not "strong" enough to link the two sentences together: you need to use something stronger, such as a conjunction or a semi-colon, or keep the two sentences separate.

Here are a few possible ways you could write this sentence:

"That also means that we have to treat them well; we have to treat them with the respect and gratitude that is their due.""That also means that we have to treat them well. We have to treat them with the respect and gratitude that is their due.""That also means that we have to treat them well by giving them the respect and gratitude that is their due."

Thanks a lot Schuyler I appreciate it. I will change the text a bit. Thank you for the tips!