Summary Tammy's Story

[viktorbug]

Hey,
meine Aufgabe war es über eine Dokumentation eine Summary zu schreiben.
In der Dokumentation geht es um eine Familie der unteren Schicht die in einem Wohnwagen wohnt.
Der Link zum Video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=37ZpauS5Doo

Ich muss die Summary bis Donnerstag abgeben und deshalb wäre es mir lieb, wenn jemand noch mal drüber schaut.
Falls sich jemand die mühe macht und sogar das Video anschaut und etwas wichtiges findet, was ich vergessen haben sollte nehme ich es auch dankbar auf.

Danke im vorraus



The documentary “Tammy story“ which aired as a part of PBS documentary deals with the social class in America.

The episode tells about a family that lives on a trailer park.

Tammy the mother of the family and her son Mate don't hate the live at the trailer park, but they also don't have another choice because they live on the bottom rung of the social scale.

Tammy works at a fast food restaurant as a cleaner, where she doesn't earn enough money to make a better living for her family.

Mate tries to help his mother when she is at work and cleans the trailer.

Since Tammy was a little girl her life is guided by poverty because her father has 22 children's.

Although she works hard her son Matt doesn’t accept his mother’s lifestyle and is ashamed that she wears the same clothes every day and doesn’t fix herself up.

So Matt treats his mother with disrespect like all the other people who call his mother “Trashy Bitch” when Tammy is on her way to work.

This is the reason why she isn't happy now and her desire for the future is to be happy.

Matt tries to get independent of his family he thinks he belongs to a higher social class than his mother and his younger brother.

On this account he doesn't want to hang out with him because he is ashamed how his younger brother dress.

Matt has the pursuit of happiness, he want to reach something and to live a life in wealth.

So one day he wants to become an architect or lawyer.

[LongBeach]

Hey. I think it's too late now. Don't be disappointed. Next time I can help you.

There were very few mistakes in your text. The worst mistake -in my opinion- was in this sentence:

Since Tammy was a little girl her life is guided by poverty because her father has 22 children's.

You need PRESENT PERFECT PROGRESSIVE here because something started in the past and is still in progress. In which class are you? I wonder if you have already dealt with this tense.

Correct: 
Since Tammy was a little girl poverty has been defining her life because her father has 22 children.

If you have any further questions do not hesitate to contact me.

Best wishes from Long Beach, CA.

[UltimoSparc]

Hi.

Some advices

"Tammy the mother of the family" I would like "Family mother Tammy"

"to make a better living for her family"

I would write "to get better family life"

"Mate tries to help his mother when she is at work and cleans the trailer."
Does Mate help his mom at the work?

I would write "Mate helps his mother at workplace and home."

[Keswick (Contributor)]

Hi.

Some advices

"Tammy the mother of the family" I would like "Family mother Tammy" - I have to disagree: you wouldn't say "family mother" in English

"to make a better living for her family"

I would write "to get better family life" - I have to disagree: you would say "to make a better living for her family"

"Mate tries to help his mother when she is at work and cleans the trailer."
Does Mate help his mom at the work?

I would write "Mate helps his mother at workplace and at home."

[tiorthan]

I fully agree with Keswick.

Hi.

Some advices

"Tammy the mother of the family" I would like "Family mother Tammy" - I have to disagree: you wouldn't say "family mother" in English

"to make a better living for her family"

I would write "to get better family life" - I have to disagree: you would say "to make a better living for her family"

"Mate tries to help his mother when she is at work and cleans the trailer."
Does Mate help his mom at the work?

I would write "Mate helps his mother at the workplace and at home."

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