Bitte um Korrektur

[londonxlondon]

Hi, ich bin neu hier und wollte fragen, ob ihr meinen Text korrigieren könnt?
Bitte macht mich darauf aufmerksam was ich falsch gemacht habe und wie ich es besser machen könnte

Danke im Voraus!

Dear ladies and gentlemen!
My name is Tjaan Thabo, I am 24 years old and I have left my homeland Gunjur in search of easy money and a better life. First of all, I want to state my reasons for my emigration.
Six years ago, I decided to immigrate to Spain although I love my homeland. But the bad working conditions forced me to this decision. After my college graduation I have landed a job teaching science in a high school. The salary was hardly enough for the necessities. Furthermore I live in constant fear because of the political upheaval. For this reasons I decided to chase riches from Africa to Europe.
During travelling to Spain across the Mediterranean I was faced with hardship and suffering. Together with many other migrants I travelled with a boat to Malta. At sea we had to survive without water and food for days. We were all over the moon as we have reached our destination alive. This euphoria was disappeared a few days later. I was searching a work but I only find the least desirable work, to handle pesticides. More than two years I have made this work but it damaged my health.
Now I live with hundreds of other immigrants in a patch of wood in southern Spain. Our homes were built out of plastic sheeting and cardboard. Piles of garbage and flies are everywhere. In other words we suffer here.
There is another thing I should like to mention: I would never consider return back home because I can’t go home empty-handed. More and more people in Africa are of the opinion that in Europe is money all over. They could not imagine how life is really like here.

[Duckduck (Contributor)]

Hi londonxlondon und willkommen im Forum!

Bevor das mit dem Korrigieren losgehen kann, wäre es hilfreich, wenn Du uns etwas zum Text sagen könntest. Ist das ein rein ausgedachter Brief oder eine Art Zusammenfassung eines Textes? Wofür brauchst Du das?

Ich stelle diese Fragen, um bei der Festlegung der Sprachebene sicherer zu sein. Die wechselt nämlich etwas in dem Text und wenn es ein "wirklicher, echter" Brief sein soll, müsste er natürlich eine angemessene Sprache verwenden.

Grüße
Duckduck

[londonxlondon]

hi, danke für die Antwort

das ist ein Brief von einem Flüchtling, der nach Europa geflüchtet ist und nun einen Brief an die Immigrationsbehörde schreibt.

mfg